Welcome to Joke Central (and more)

Jokes

What kind of animal needs to wear a wig?

A bald eagle!

What do you call a fake noodle?

An impasta

What is the biggest lie in the world?

I read terms of sevice and disagreed

Do you have holes on your underpants?

No? So how do you stick your legs through?

What is the most odd thing in the world?

Every second number

A lady was walking and holding an egg.Then she dropped the egg, and the egg fell 2 feet but didn't crack. How is this possible?

The egg didn't hit the ground yet.

Why do you smear peanut butter on the road?

To go with the traffic jam.

Why did the math book look so sad?

Because it had a lot of problems.

Why do zombies hate apples?

You have to be alive to like apples. So they don't like them or hate them.

Why can't your head be 12 inches long?

Because then it would be a foot.

What has 8 legs, 8 arms, and 8 eyes?

4 people.

What is the definition of a broken pencil?

pointless.

In what school do you learn how to greet people?

Hi school.

Why does a polar bear have a fur coat?

Because it would look silly in a jacket.

Anti-Jokes



Where would you find an elephant?

The same place you lost it.

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple?

Finding half a worm in your apple.

What do you call a boomerang that will not come back?

A stick.

What is blue and smells like red paint?

Blue paint

What do you call a joke that's not funny?

A sentence

What do you call a fly without wings?

A fly. A very unfortunate fly

How can you make a lemon drop?

Throw a lemon and let it drop.

What started after 1920?

1921

What did the truck driver say when he lost his truck?

"Where's my truck?"

What is white and fluffy?

A white fluff